I have told several stories about being mistaken for a male. It happened again Sunday night at Walmart. I was even wearing one of my new hats I bought specifically so people wouldn't think I was a dude. I had just picked up my mom and step dad from the airport. We went to Walmart to get groceries before meeting friends for dinner. I was handing my mom a pan for the turkey. My step dad was somewhere else looking for another item. A female worker commented on how nice it was that my mom was able to get a man to help with the shopping. Neither of us corrected her.
While we waited for my doctor visit this morning, I heard a female nurse tell Dr. Meluch who was in the waiting room. He opened the door and saw it was me. He said, "It's not (whatever his name is). It's Troy!" He then joked about how I could be mistaken for a man because of my hair. I told him it happened all the time. I was used to it. He was very close to me and looked me straight in the eye and said, "I'll tell you exactly what you are. You are beautiful." How sweet!!!
While he was examining me, he asked me if I had been working throughout this journey. I told him I had. As a matter of fact, I went to work that morning before coming for treatment. He said, "See now, you need to be on the front page of papers. They need to show true heroes like you and not stories about all these people who want something for nothing or people who shoot other people. What's that all about!"
He seemed so genuine. For him to call me a hero took me by surprise. A lot of people have been telling me how strong and courageous I have been. That baffles me. It's not like I asked to get cancer and have to go through chemo. What else was I going to do? I suppose I could have refused treatment, but that wasn't really an option. The rest is a simple matter of doing what I had to do. To call me strong and courageous? That's hard enough to swallow. For my doctor, a man who sees this every day to call me a hero? I'm not sure how to process that.
When I got home, I had several cards and gifts in the mail. Morgan brought them to me while I was upstairs typing my blog. Many of them again calling me strong and congratulating me on completing this journey. Very touching and unexpected. Quite a blessing.
Later in the evening, I was talking with Mike. I told him what the doctor and what others said and shared how I was having trouble processing it. He said he felt the same way as others. He helped me see that it's not a simple matter of going through the motions. It's been my attitude through it all. I could have spent the past six months at home in bed feeling sorry for myself. Instead, I tried to make the most out of it. He compared me to a problem employee. We have an employee who abuses sick time. This person makes every effort not to come to work when there is nothing wrong. I make every effort to go to work even when things are not going well.
I do know my attitude had a big part in my journey. But, I still have trouble accepting the compliments. After all, I did not do this alone. My family, my church family, my friends. They all prayed for me and I truly felt the touch of those prayers. My sister, whom I have called a bulldozer, refused to let me go through this alone. My boss and coworkers stepped up to help me get the job done. Belmont's overall support was shown through many different avenues and many different people.Other acquaintances who helped make sure my women's self defense classes still happened. The meals and gift cards. The encouraging messages on CaringBridge. The facebook shows of support. The cards, texts, and emails. The many other things done out of love. The staff at TN Oncology who made an unpleasant experience bearable. Dr. Meluch who listened to me and was determined to fix me.
Trust me, without the amazing support I had throughout this entire journey, there is absolutely no way anyone would be calling me strong and courageous - let alone a hero.
Thank you all - from the bottom of my heart.
(PS. It was dark when I finished with the first blog of the day. I will release my ballloons in the morning.)
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| Dr. Meluch - photo from http://www.tnoncology.com/physicians/physician-profiles/anthony-a-meluch-md.222978 |
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